Mar 29, 2013

day 1

 
 
I'm completely smitten. And of course, Ryan is too.
We stayed in the hospital for 2 nights and in those 2 nights there were probably 2,000 kisses given-- a few between Ryan and I, but a majority on Lincoln's chubby cheeks. We celebrated his 1 day old birthday the following night at 8:47 by smooshing his face with both of our kisses. I like to imagine what he's thinking and in this last picture he's saying, "Oh come on guys, you're embarrassing me here!" 
 
Isn't life wonderful? As a whole of course. Because there are moments and periods in life where stuff just down right sucks. But as a whole, life is beautiful. Creating life is a humbling gift we've been blessed with and has made our life even more beautiful. :)
 
The two nights in the hospital were magical and quite peaceful. Lincoln was SO pleasant and easy to take care of. But he fooled us, and my mother intuition tells me this won't be the last. He wasn't quite a breeze like he was in the hospital the night we brought him home. I don't know what it is about the transition from hospital setting to the home-- I bet those nurses have something to do with it. They probably have some secret with keeping a newborn asleep through the night, but hospital policy doesn't allow that information to leave the hospital. Unfortunately, as a surgical nurse, I didn't receive that particular training. Maybe I can make friends with with an L&D nurse and swindle the secret out of her. I'll get back to you on that...
 
Which brings us to the day we brought our son home for the first time. And he slept and he slept and he slept.. which is great right? Except it was all during the day. And then night came, which was the longest night of my life-- this is coming from the girl who requires 9 hours of sleep a night. It's a requirement, not just something I enjoy. And then the second night came, and it was the same.
 
Only a few days in and I found myself breaking down crying. Normal right? Almost like a mother's rite of passage. Lack of sleep, lack of energy, a recovering body, let's not forget extremely sore breasts, and lack of faith in myself to be the mother he deserves. Our middle of the night feedings are the most endearing to me. I hold him in my arms, stroke his face and play with his little fingers. We rock back and forth and I tell him over and over how much I love him. I won't be perfect and I won't know everything, but one thing I will do is love him with all my heart... the heart that he's already stolen from me. :)

6 comments:

  1. Those first few week with no sleep are so hard! It does get better, I promise. You've probably already heard this, but it helps to keep lights low and not talk to them or play with them during night time feedings so they start to know that nighttime is for sleep. He's such a cutie! They are only a newborn for a few short weeks...enjoy it!

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    1. thanks jen. i know i keep telling myself this stage will go by fast. He's only been home a little over a week and I can't believe how different he looks. he already looks grown up. ha. thanks for the advice. i'll take all I can get. ;) i hope you're doing well with your two.

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  2. i know D's first day home was hard on her. It wasnt until i put a pillow under her mattress to incline it a little like the little bed at the hospital was like. Then she did MUCH better. But the whole night/day confusion is hard!!

    and im SO done with having kiddos. but this seriously makes me miss it. He is TOO cute! love all the pictures you got while at the hospital!

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  3. Liz you are an awesome writer! It is totally normal to brake down and start crying! Heck i still do it! Those first few weeks are pretty hard! It's a good thing they are so cute! My pediatrician told me the best way to get your baby to sleep at night is to keep them on a good schedule during the day. He said to be sure and feed them every 3 hours. If they are sleeping you just got to wake them up. That was hard for me at first especially cause they are so had to wake up sometimes. We would have to get ice and get our hands really cold and rub them on their chest. It totally helped with my boys. But doing all this really did help with both boys. At about 2 weeks they were both sleeping 6-7 hours at night. Don't know if it works for everyone but just a suggestion of something you could try. In the end you are the mommy so do whatever feels right and works for your family!

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  4. I cried so much when Ava was born it was ridiculous. Fortunately when Sadie came along (and Grace) I was already used to the no sleep thing and was able to function much better. (I am (was) a nine hour a night girl too!) Good luck. It will get easier as he gets older for sure. I like what Julie had to say about keeping a schedule. It really does help!! My kids sleep through the night by 9 weeks! (and only woke up once starting at 4 weeks!)

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  5. Jenn (above) has it good!!!! Jude still gets up once a night and he's 15 months old! I didn't find out about the whole "schedule" thing for a long time. But since he has some under-nourishment issues with his EE, I don't mind breastfeeding him at night. Wouldn't it be the worst if he was really hungry and I didn't feed him?!?! You would look like you just spent a day at the spa after you gave birth. Wasn't the epidural amazing?! I felt like a million bucks one I got mine. He is beautiful!!!! I am soooooo happy for your cute little FAMILY!!!! <3 <3 <3 <3

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